If you’re looking for a good laugh today, read this post.
Michelle Obama announced today that her October bid to break the world record for the most people doing jumping jacks in a 24-hour period was successful. That means the first lady is now a world record holder. Well, it’s debatable… keep reading.
On October 11, Michelle Obama led about 400 elementary and middle-school students from Washington in jumping jacks on the South Lawn of the White House. This was in conjunction with other jumping jacks events were held around the world on Oct. 11. How Michelle Obama was able to prove to Guinness that 300,265 people did jumping jacks all over the world in a 24 hour period is beyond me. I’m still trying to figure out how her husband, war monger and assassinator, won the Nobel Peace Prize. Nevertheless, Guinness accepted the figure and this number of jumper jackers shattered the old record of 20,425.
But wait, there is a problem. It looks as though Guinness World Records changed the rules so that Mrs. Obama could “shatter the record.”
The prior record holder, Boys & Girls Clubs of America, had a more difficult task in order to earn the prior Guinness World Record. They posted that in order to earn the record for the most people performing jumping jacks in multiple venues, Guinness World Records required they do jumping jacks simultaneously for two consecutive minutes. And on March 22, 2011 at 3:30 p.m. PST the Boys & Girls Clubs of America successfully set the world record with 20,425 participants at 362 locations (Clubs).
Michelle Obama’s “record” was not simultaneous, nor did she do two consecutive minutes of jumping jacks. She did barely over a minute’s worth of jumping jacks and had a 24-hour period to see participation. Just the like the Nobel Peace Prize her husband received, she received an award for something she did not earn.
But who am I to argue with the President’s wife and Guinness? Now, according to the Guinness World Records website, all that was required to break the record was “people needed to get on their feet and perform jumping jacks for one minute during the 24-hour time period.”
Did they change the rules to make it easier for Michelle Obama to break the record? Why is it not the same? And did Michelle Obama just steal away a world record from over 20,000 boys and girls?
And if that isn’t bad enough, she hits kids too. Okay, well not on purpose that we know of. But the video of Michelle Obama starting her jumping jack world record quest begins with a her smacking a little girl standing next to her. Nobody was hurt and it was unintentional, so it’s okay to laugh.
And now for the funny stuff. The reactions to this story are hilarious. Here are a few for your reading entertainment:
“First time in my life I have been proud of my country.”
“She must be exhausted following this feat, perhaps a nice 17 day vacation in Hawaii at taxpayer expense would restore her strength.”
“She also set a Guinness record for eating the most flapjacks in a single setting.”
“If she did about 20,000 more she might be able to shed some blubber off that double wide caboose that follows her around everywhere she goes while telling the peasants what we can and cannot feed ourselves or our children.”
“So far this is the main accomplishment of the Obama administration. You go girl!”
“Please…she did a few jumping jacks with some kids…let’s get a measurement on her sense of entitlement…I’ll bet THAT’S a record.”
“This should give her the edge for the next Nobel Peace Prize.”
“I was wondering how the right-wing Smear-O-Sphere was going to spin this story.”
Well, now you know.
Facebook
Twitter
It is really, really weird, and not a little creepy, how obsessed you are with, of all things to criticize about this presidency, the various extra-curricular activities of the man’s wife. Most people would say there’s really nothing controversial about the First Lady leading a bunch of children in doing some jumping jacks, so naturally, there must be a conspiracy there. Either that, or you’re just a paranoid douchebag looking for an excuse to hate on these people and are too lazy and stupid to investigate and discuss actual important issues at hand. And then there’s:
>>But the video of Michelle Obama starting her jumping jack world record quest begins with a her smacking a little girl standing next to her. Nobody was hurt and it was unintentional, so it’s okay to laugh.
OMG, are you fucking kidding me. You actually went to the trouble to type that? Her hand glanced against this girl’s face in a manner so gentle that the girl continues smiling and jumping and appears to be completely unaffected, and you have a cow over that…but Laura Bush killing a man with her car gets nary a syllable from you?
You crack me up, you know that?
>>It’s like her husband promotes a good economy, but then advocates for economy-killing measures like higher taxes and imposes more regulations.
I love how you devote hundreds of words to this jumping jack bullshit but then toss of something like THIS as an aside, without even attempting to lift a finger to back it up with evidence. Priorities, man! Okay, I’m all ears. How do higher taxes on the wealthy and imposing the sort of regulations that would have helped avert the mess we’re in today “kill” the economy?
All ears. Go for it. Just as soon as you’re done counting jumping jacks. We’ll be right here.
It is really, really weird, and not a little creepy, how obsessed you are with, of all things to criticize about this presidency, the various extra-curricular activities of the man’s wife.
Couldn’t have said it better myself…