This, That and the Other Thing

Ira Schwartz
March 30, 2011 Posted by Ira Schwartz ira@hollywoodrepublican.net

March 30th, 2011

 

Welcome to our weekly edition.  Since National Doughnut Week is fast approaching I thought it would be nice to look at the history of doughnuts and Law Enforcement.

SOME HISTORY OF THE DOUGHNUT

 

I give you the Doughnut

According to Wikipedia doughnuts have a disputed history. One theory suggests that doughnuts were introduced into North America by Dutch settlers, who were responsible for popularizing other American desserts, including cookies, apple and cream pie, and cobbler.   Indeed, in the 19th century, doughnuts were sometimes referred to as one kind of olykoek(a Dutch word literally meaning “oil cake”), a “sweetened cake fried in fat.”

 

Doughnuts.....

Hansen Gregory, an American, claimed to have invented the ring-shaped doughnut in 1847 aboard a lime-trading ship when he was only sixteen years old. Gregory was dissatisfied with the greasiness of doughnuts twisted into various shapes and with the raw center of regular doughnuts. He claimed to have punched a hole in the center of dough with the ship’s tin pepper box and later taught the technique to his mother.

According to anthropologist Paul R. Mullins, the first cookbook mentioning doughnuts was an 1803 English volume which included doughnuts in an appendix of American recipes. By the mid-19th century the doughnut looked and tasted like today’s doughnut, and was viewed as a thoroughly American food.

AHHHHH DOUGHNUTS………DOH!!!!!

Doughnuts and Law Enforcement go together like beer and nuts.  But in the small town of South Berwick Maine they take it one step further.   They have passed a city ordinance that prohibits anyone from parking in front of any of the cities local Dunkin Donuts, specifically the one located on Main Street.  If you do you will be ticketed.  The fine is $175 and/or up to 30 days in jail.  The Mayor says it’s to keep the traffic flowing not to allow the police easy access to the doughnut shops.  They say a picture is worth a thousand words so you decide.

Loading Zone

  SOME ADDITIONAL PROOF

 

Who's watching the town?

 

  THE ULTIMATE DOUGHNUT SHOP

 Good old St. Louis is all a buzz with the opening of a new donut shop in Souard.  It’s called “The Sultry Donut Shop and Café.”  Their press release follows….

“The Sultry Donut Shop and Café features beautiful women dressed in scantily clad clothing, dressing up for our daily themes, such as Military Monday, Bikini Wednesday and Fantasy Friday. You will also be able to offer our suggestions for Suggestion Saturday, where you, the customer, get to choose what the girls dress up as.”

Sultry Donuts

This elevates the art of eating donuts to a whole new level.  Hope the food is good.  If it isn’t do you think anyone will care?

Excuse me. Can't a guy eat a donut in peace

STICK A PIN IN ME I’M READY TO POP

 

Voodoo Doughnuts

 

In the once quiet town of Portland Oregon the making of the donut has been taken to a new level.  Voodoo Donuts, the brain child of Kenneth “Cat Daddy” Pogson and Tres Shannon has taken this town by storm.  Their signature Voodoo Doughnut is a gingerbread man-shaped, with a pretzel stick stabbed through its abdomen and red jelly “blood” filling.

 

 Their donut menu is numerous with such favorites as

The Texas Challenge:  A giant doughnut equal to 6 normal size doughnuts.  They proudly claim if you can eat this doughnut in 80 seconds or less it’s free.
The Arnold Palmer:  Plain cake doughnut with vanilla frosting and lemonade with ice tea dust on top!

Dirty snowballs: Chocolate cake doughnut with marshmallow topping, dipped in coconut and a dollop of peanut butter in the middle!

And the perennial favorite.. 

The Old Dirty Bastard:  Raised yeast doughnut with chocolate frosting, Oreo’s and peanut butter!

Check please

 Hope you all enjoyed this trip down donut lane. 

Ohhhh...You're leaving already?

I ’m going to leave you with a few parting pictures for you to enjoy. 

Calling all cars

Code 10-10

Homer alone

I want to let all of you know this article was meant to be good natured fun and not to be taken as a statement, political or otherwise.  All of us here at A Hollywood Republican hold the Law Enforcement community in the highest regard.

That's Better!!!

Err….So until next time remember to “Watch the Skies”

One Response to This, That and the Other Thing

  1. Dolores on March 30, 2011 at 10:48 am

    My husband and I were Hoboken, NJ to babysit our son and his partner’s dog. Right across the street from the apartment was a Dunkin Donut shop. We felt very, very safe the whole time we were there. And we love policemen…let them eat doughnuts!!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *